Losing It!

“God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.”

~ Psalm 46:1 (KJV)

I recently lost twenty pounds and I have to tell you I feel awesome! What is my secret? Do I exercise two hours a day? No, just 30 minutes a day on an exercise bike. Am I trying the latest, greatest, magazine diet fad? No! Do I count calories, starve myself, or only eat grapefruit? No, to all of those questions.

God helped me to discover a new truth. He showed me how much food had control over me. I had allowed food to become my comfort in my sorrow, something to do in times of boredom, somewhere to run to in times of stress or even in celebration. During my years of childhood abuse is where it all began. My circumstances overwhelmed me, and I felt so out alone and out of control. I knew God was with me during that horrible time in my life, but I wanted something I could grab onto. Instead of running to God for an answer that would fill that need, I ran to food. In some ways, I was aware of it, but in other ways that decision was at a much deeper level than I was capable of understanding.

As I reached puberty and began to develop, I received a lot more unwanted attention from my abuser. Deep down, I thought if I gained weight and was less appealing to him, it might make the abuse stop. This habit of running to food has stayed with me all these years, but until now I wasn’t able to face it head on and deal with it. It was simply too hard for me. I would get victory for a while, but then all the weight would just come back and I would feel defeated again. I needed to find a key to unlock another door from my past, and God was right beside me handing it to me.

When God revealed this to me, I began to run to Him when I felt I needed food and was not hungry. I began to learn how to listen to my body to figure out when I was truly hungry or when it was something else that I needed or desired. I stopped buying every new magazine at the grocery checkout that promised a huge weight loss in only two weeks! Every week there was some new diet to try that promised amazing results. I spent a lot of time and money in the past trying to find an answer, and I felt God telling me to stop and listen to Him instead.

The last thing I did, which was one of the hardest (and relates to my blog post “Submit, Who Me?”) was to ask my husband to help hold me accountable for my weight. I had already asked my lifelong, best friend to hold me accountable, but this was different. Although that was very helpful, it was just part of the solution I needed. My husband saw what I was eating every day. He noticed when I didn’t exercise. I had never even told him how much I weighed before. He never cut me down or made comments about my weight gain, but I never before had invited him into that area of my life. It was a huge step for me!

My husband is now my weight loss coach. He doesn’t micromanage me, but I am now willing to listen to his advice. He has helped to motivate me to exercise every morning. He now knows how much I weigh! I report my weight to him every day, and he is helping me to set realistic weight loss goals. Once I let him into that area of my life, he had become my biggest encourager. I never before had utilized the best weight loss tools I had—God and my husband. God began to show me that I needed to allow Him to fill the empty places in my life that I was filling with food. He showed me to run to Him when I was tempted to binge on food and also to submit this area of my life to my husband.

Now I stop eating when I’m full—no matter what is left on my plate. If I can only eat only a couple of bites, then I wrap up the rest for later. I’m now eating a lot less than I used to. I’m making better choices and naturally craving food that is better for my body. I don’t crave sugar like I did before. Don’t get me wrong, I still love sugar, but I just don’t have a need to eat it every day like I always thought I did—it doesn’t have control over me!

I know that my journey is far from over. I don’t have all the answers, but I know the One who does! I know that this is something I still have to work through and keep going to lose the next twenty pounds! The difference is, now I feel I have the tools to help me keep moving forward. I may take a few steps back along the way, but God is ready and able to pick me up and help me continue the path He has for me. It’s another step of healing and freedom for me. God’s weight loss plan is the best! Invite Him to show you if food has control over you. If you are married, I encourage you to begin trusting your husband enough to hold you accountable. If you are single, find a trusted friend who will be honest enough with you to tell you when you are eating too much or making poor food choices.

Find your victory with God’s help and those He has placed in your life. Ask God to help you find the key to unlocking your weight loss. He is always waiting for you; just ask Him!